messages from world leaders and others for Christmas

Here are some messages for all of you.


VLAD THE LAD PUTIN. I have had some bother recently from some people who don't seem to like me or my policies. So by way of my slave known as Medvedev I have published a set of new policies to address the needs of our Proles. I will ensure I am elected president in the Summer so that I can put them all in place. Meanwhile I challenge any of you with a black belt in Judo to come over and give me a good fight. If it is a good fight you will be awarded the special medal of #Russia. However if you try and succeed in beating me, heaven forbid, then it is a trip for you to the Lubyanka for an extended stay.




PRESIDENT AMOURDINNERJACKET of Iran. Happy Christmas to all you Kaffours. In our great country people are free to worship in any faith. The Yanks are worried about our nucleur programme. You have nothing to fear. Our Programme is entirely open to the world except that we keep the works underground in a cave in the mountains. I mean this very sincerely that it is not our intention to lauch a nucleur at tack on any one unless of course someone tries to invade.




PRESIDENT BASHER ASSAD of Syria. I am truly ashamed that any of our westerners believe that our loyal and consientious troops would ever fire on our own people. No, we have been invaded by hordes of terrorists and it is our duty to eliminate this threat. Some innocent civilians may die in cross fire of course. WE have introduced many reform s which I believe sincerely that most Syrians accept. Except of course in Homs which has always been a very backward city. In the old days there were no traffic lights and sign posts to towns on roads were indicated by a red light. When we started traffic lights, there were 100 accidents to Homs drivers.(This story is true and was told me by a Syrian)




PRESIDENT OF THE PEOPLE Dim Dong Dung of North Korea, Did you see that spontaneous outbread of sadness on the faces of our newscasters when the death of my old man was announced? We have a wonderful country and I want to ensure that no proles ever leave the country and get infected with terrible western ideals like Freedom. I will ensure a tough regime against our enemies to show them how strong we all are here.




Finally a note from




KATE AND WILLS; I hope you enjoyed that wedding we had recently. WE used the St James Version of the Bible and B.C.M right which has marvellous language which your current versions sadly lack. Anyway I am off now to the Falkland Islands. It is Summer Time over there and the temperature has been know to reach 70%F ! I will have a great time looking at the Pelicans etc Here now is a little flying joke for you. As you know I fly helicopters. Well one day a dimwitted new airline pilot told traffic control he was lost. Control told him to turn left 90% and descend to 5000 ft and then try and report his true height and position. 5 minutes later the pilot phoned control and answered "I am 6 foot tall and facing the co-pilot...........

Finally let me personally wish you a very happy and holy Christmas time and on Jan 2nd or 3rd I will give information as to the future of blog.